Thursday, February 16, 2006

I've been touched by His Noodly Appendage

I think it is important to inform you all that I have had a religious epiphany, and am giving up Buddhism to join the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I realize this will come as a shock to many of you, but I want to be open and honest, I do not want to hide my faith from those I care about. Why such a sudden change of heart? Overwhelming evidence that the world was created by the Flying Spaghetti Monster has recently come to my attention. This evidence is concrete, and cannot be denied. I am not alone, there are currently over 10 million Flying Spaghetti Monster devotees. Most of them are very secretive, as our beliefs have been mocked as superstition and fantasy. I do believe I saw several at Val Day this past weekend, however, dressed in their pirate regalia as decreed by Him.

Many of you may not see much of me in the coming days and weeks, as I have decided to spend much of my free time spreading His word, and campaigning for the Flying Spaghetti Monster Creation theory to be taught in public schools, alongside Evolution and (where applicable) Intelligent Design. I highly encourage all of you to join me in my journey; the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is truly a welcoming and wonderful place. Why else should you join the Church of the FSM? Consider these wise words from their website...

-Flimsy moral standards.
-Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
-Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.
What more can you ask for? Please, join the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster today, and you too can be touched by His Noodly Appendage!